Raising a Pimp Daddy Toddler

I have learned over the weekend I have my hands full – full of a pimp daddy toddler. It all began at a birthday party for a little girl in LM’s class at the local Chuck E Cheese. Of course, being the great mommy that I am took LM to have pizza and cake with the mouse. It was lovely and loud at the same time.

Imagine a bazillion kids all running around screaming at the same time while game noise is going wild. “Toddlers Gone Wild” film at 11. That place is nuts – a gold mine, I tell you.

Now, the party is over and it’s time to go, I begin to gather the treat bag and jacket, when I swing around I see LM smooching with “J” and several other girls. There is a line, no lie either, a line of girls all waiting to kiss LM.

J’s mother and I made it into a joke thankfully. I told her he’s just practicing for his high school days and she laughing saying well her dear daughter is a hussy at the age of 5 and kisses all the boys.

After the entourage of girls followed LM to the door and we got out alive I asked him who they all were he calmly looked at me and said, Mom, my girlfriends. As if, I should have known all that.

Later that evening, I invited over friends of ours for a play date when “H” no sooner walked in the door and LM asked, “Hey H, you wanna see my room?” - This was asked before she even had her shoes off. I froze as did H’s mom and both asked, “did we hear that right?”

I am raising a pick up artist and he is in his prime at the age of four.