Happy New Year

After serious & cautious consideration.....your contract of friendship has been renewed for the New Year 2008!

It was a very hard decision to make. So try not to screw it up!!!

My Wish for You in 2008

ﻌMay peace break into your house & may thieves come to steal your debts.
ﻌMay the pockets of your jeans become a magnet of $100 bills.
ﻌMay love stick to your face like Vaseline & may laughter assault your lips!
ﻌMay your clothes smell of success like smoking tires & may happiness slap you across the face & may your tears be that of joy.
ﻌMay the problems you had forget your home address!

In simple words …

May 2008 be the best year of your life!!!

Happy New Year Friends!

Wishing you all the best in 2008!

Say it ain’t so. New Year’s Eve is upon us again. Where did the year go? I have not even blogged about Christmas yet. That is really not my fault though, I have the most darling pictures of LM and my camera is MIA due to crazy boy toy leaving it at the brother’s house. So that leaves me with blogging about NYE.

Welcome 2008. It is that time for crazy resolutions that no one ever really keeps and for the wheel of life to keep on turning. 2007 was full of twists and turns and a roller coaster ride that I thought would never stop. It actually didn’t stop but it slowed down a little bit, I think.

As for what 2008 brings me, only God knows however, I’m open to anything. I’m looking forward to a solid year of adventures with LM as he starts big kid school and sports. I am also looking forward to what adventures are in my future. I hope to travel more and hopefully be in a cozy new home and to grow another year closer to the boy toy.

I’m hoping for making huge sales and commissions with my new part time job as a bridal consultant. HA, me in the bridal sells business – who would have thought – this is the girl that is anti-valentine’s day or was, I’ll get to that story another day. I make decent money at my full time job but really, I cannot beat the money for part time and I get to pick my hours. Plus the girls I work with are F U N!!

I pulled this little gig out when I went to pick up a bridesmaid dress. I got offered the job on the spot. Ya know, due to my great looks, witty charm and vibrant sense of humor and total out going personality. Ok Ok maybe that was a little overboard, but it makes me feel good.

Who walks into a place when the Manager puts the customer on hold and says, “DMM, would you like to work here part-time, its not like you are never in here?’ The thought that ran through my head, “are you kidding me?” But then I thought what the hell extra cash for LM and I would be nice.

It’s really not a bad deal, but anywho…where was I…O yes, 2008…may you all have a great New Year’s and KISS the one you love most at midnight.

Are YOU Smarter then a 5th Grader?

There are 7 girls on a bus
Each girl has 7 backpacks
In each backpack, there are 7 big cats
For every big cat there are 7 little cats

Question: How many legs are there on the bus?
This is a real math problem so don't say that the bus has no legs.

So tell me what your guess is and I'll reveal the answer later on...

Merry Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas to all of you.

20/20 Vision

I am 20/20 Vision today – what a cool unexplainable feeling it is to wake up after the need of corrective lenses and having the ability to see. LM thought it was the coolest thing, me needing to wear this shield type thing for when I sleep for the next 7 days.

He quickly put it on and started running around the house, in his football shoes and shorts, of course no shirt carrying the football acting like he was Tony Romo. He then proceeded to tell me that my eyes looked slimy – however, he meant swelled as the boy toy and myself had discussed that earlier. He just couldn't say it right.

My right eye took 1 minute and 25 seconds and the left eye took a whopping 25 seconds. Simply amazing. You go in lay down on the table they tape up your eyelashes then insert a clamp to keep you from blinking. Once that is done they put a suction cup on your eyeball and you lose vision – it is not as bad as it sounds. I was a nervous wreck about that part but no issues. Then comes the laser cutting, you feel pressure like someone sticking their thumb on your eye and BAM it’s done. They peel back the cornea flap put it back on make it all smooth and holy shit you can see. The vision is a little blurry at first or cloudy but as the day progresses it gets clearer.

As far as the surgery, not a bad experience until I got home I had much burning and tearing. They tell you its like when you peel an onion. WRONG, it’s like peeling a billion onions at one time. I had that sensation for about two hours then it finally subsided.

All I could think was, damn it, I gave birth and it didn’t hurt this bad. However, my eyes are very sensitive to light and anything that comes near them. I should have expected this. I talked to quite a few folks about the drama I had afterwards and I am the only one who experienced this out of my friends. The doctor explained it happens to about 40% of the patients, well I’m in that ratio I guess.

Overall, it was not bad and I would do it again. I highly recommend Lasik if you are a good candidate.

Going Under the Knife...or um Laser

Today, this morning actually, I am having Lasik Surgery. I cannot freaking wait!! For those of you lucky enough to have 20/20 vision you have no idea of what a pain in the ass it is to wear glasses or contacts every single day.

I cannot wait to wake up in the middle of the night roll over and actually be able to SEE the alarm clock. I cannot wait until my next eye exam when I can walk out of that office not spending 100’s of dollars on glasses and/or contacts – and yes, that’s with a great vision plan.

I cannot wait to go to the beach and NOT get sand kicked up in my contact lens when playing volleyball. I cannot wait for the time I can play volleyball and not worry about something being on my contact lens and calling a time out and rushing to my bag to dig for the bottle of saline solution.

To prepare for Lasik you must wear your glasses for several days – IN A ROW. The last time I wore glasses longer then a day I was in 8th grade. This is the first time that I have actually listened to my eye doctor when he said, “No contacts from here on out.”

I simply can not wait!!

Merry Christmas to me!!

Priceless

After being afraid of this man in the red suit for four years my LM finally sat on his lap and asked him for a skateboard, proudly as you can see.

HDTV is the DEVIL

There is this sweet little invention called HDTV that makes your television screen so crisp, clear and amazingly life like you feel as if you are sitting right in the screen. It is a must have especially if you are even thinking of watching some type of sporting event, such as football.

The problem, not all local channels are dishing out the signal for HD for their network. This is causing major issues in my household so much as I am on the breaking point of hearing it discussed. You see a request waiver has been sent in the local network asking for permission for the signal out of NYC, the problem, permission denied.

What gives Mr. Big Shot at the local station?

Not sure, I think just because they sit in a fancy office in their fancy suit and want to make people like me suffer listening to their crazed boyfriends rave about how important it is to have HDTV for the football games or any televised event for that matter they deny all requests.

The solution buy 2 HDTV antennas that are listed as the strongest by your local retailers only to find they do not work because you choose to live in a valley that blocks all signals going into your basement rec room. Another solution, purchase the strongest antenna known to mankind fiddle around with it on the roof, have your girlfriend stand on the roof while you check the signal only to move it a week later. In the freezing cold, mind you, I was not a happy camper.

At this point the antenna is on the highest point on the roof and yep, that’s right you guessed it, the signal still comes in and out, maybe even worse then it did before. My goodness you cannot even think about watching a football game. What if you miss the most important play of the game? It went out about 5 or 6 times in a 10 minute span for about 5 seconds each time. O yes, we got it down to a science of the whens and how longs.

The final solution, buy a new flat screen Plasma TV for Dad’s house as a Christmas present then conjure up this evil plot to have him upgrade his cable to digital so you can watch the superbowl in HDTV. If this plan does not work I am seriously going to gouge out my eardrums so I do not have to hear about the importance of HDTV.

My solution? Call the local decision maker at the network giving you hassle and threaten him with bodily harm.*

I am telling you HDTV is the DEVIL…

*not really but hey at this point anything sounds good just so I don’t have to hear about what a bunch of jerks they are at the local network station it any longer.

Tee minus 30 days

In 30 days I will be sitting on a Yacht in the warm weather of the Grand Bahamas. I will be sipping fruity drinks and rubbing elbows with a bunch of muckity mucks and I will enjoy it.

Winter has reared its ugly head this week and I am already sick of it!!

May the count down begin.